Replacements
by MoonytheMarauder1
Summary: Remus warned them not to do it. But since when do his friends listen to him? The Marauders open a portal that brings their counterparts from an alternate universe into their world. As the days go by, Remus wonders- will his counterpart replace him? Because it seems as though his counterpart is already more of a Marauder than he ever was...
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Unwanted Visitors**

"I'm telling you, Moony, it'll be fine."

"And I'm telling _you_ , Padfoot, it will _not_ be fine."

Remus Lupin stood in the Gryffindor Common Room, trying to convince his three best friends that their latest best-prank-idea-ever was actually a disaster that even _they_ , the self-proclaimed Marauders, wouldn't be able to control.

All in all, it was a typical day for Remus.

"I don't care _what_ that book you found says. Inviting our counterparts from an alternate universe to come ' _stay a while'_ is a _terrible_ idea." Remus grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Aww, _Moony_ ," James Potter whined. "Just think of all the _possibilities_. We'd only have to go to half our classes, do half the homework, we could drive the professors crazy, and we'd leave our fellow students so confused they'll fear they've gone mad."

Remus narrowed his eyes. "Absolutely not."

"Well," Sirius Black chirped happily. "We'll put it down to a vote. All in favor, raise your hand!" His and James' hands both shot into the air.

"Come on, Wormtail…" James grinned. "Think of all the _fun_ we'll have."

Peter Pettigrew bit his lip. "It _does_ sound fun… But isn't Moony usually right about this sort of thing? Like, _always_?"

"Yes." Remus grunted. "I am. Don't listen to them Peter."

"Well, if you're too scared…" sighed Sirius.

That did it. Peter was always trying to prove that he really did belong in Gryffindor. His hand joined James and Sirius'.

Remus sighed. "Outvoted…" he muttered bitterly. " _Again_."

"So, Moony, you in?" James asked, grinning the grin that made his professors feel wary.

"Well, _someone_ has to make sure you lot don't kill yourselves. I'm in." he relented.

Sirius and James let out whoops of excitement. "Excellent!" shouted James. "Come on, let's do it!"

The book James and Sirius had found in a secluded corner of the Restricted Section on a late-night kitchen run (they had hid from Filch in the library) was tattered and old, and missing its front cover. It held dozens of spells Remus was sure were illegal, but, naturally, this did not deter James or Sirius in the slightest. Whenever he brought up that fact, they casually reminded him that they were already breaking the law by being unregistered Animagi, which they had done to help him with his transformations. Sometimes Remus felt as though their becoming Animagi was their way of forcing him into things he would otherwise avoid- _Oh, but Remus, you have to... if we became Animagi for you, then you can help us with our latest prank... Moony, can I copy your homework? I forgot to do the essay, I was getting ready for the full moon…_ It felt as though they were holding it over him- a debt that was impossible to repay. He knew that they probably didn't mean it that way, but Remus still felt as though he were drowning, and no matter how hard he swam, the current kept pulling him under. He wasn't confident enough to confront them about it, and while he did stand up to his friends, he never did it enough. He never stopped them in time. He was too afraid of losing the only friends he had ever known. He was too much of a coward to tell them they were wrong, or treating Snape cruelly.

 _Some Gryffindor you are, Lupin._

The boys sat in a circle and James read an incantation aloud from the book. A pulsing blue light began to for in between them, and the four boys watched in fascination as it grew bigger and brighter... and then four shadowy figures emerged from the light.

And the Marauders were a foursome no more.

* * *

Four imposters stared at the four Marauders. All eight stared at each other in shock. After nearly five minutes of silence, Sirius turned to face Remus, grinning. "Told ya it would work, Moony."

Remus sighed. "I never said it wouldn't. I said we _shouldn't_."

Fake-Sirius raised an eyebrow. "You did what, exactly?"

James grinned. "Why, summoned our counterparts from another universe into ours, of course! Sorry to rip you so suddenly away from what you were doing, but, well, the Marauders never consider the consequences, except Moony here, but I'm sure you knew that…" James looked as though he were about to explode from excitement.

Fake-Remus frowned. "The Marauders? What's that? And what kind of stupid name is _Moony?_ "

Sirius and Remus bristled. "Hey!" Sirius shouted. " _I_ came up with that!"

"What do you mean?" Remus asked softly. "The Marauders are _us_. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs."

Fake-James grinned nervously. "Seriously? That's you guys? We don't call ourselves that."

Sirius huffed. "Well, I guess we know which universe is better."

Peter looked at his alternate self shyly. "What else is different in... your world?"

Fake-Peter shrugged. "I dunno, do I? I don't know what this one's like."

"Well," Remus said briskly. "That's that, then. We should send them back. Who knows how this could affect things? We should-"

"Look, Moony." Sirius interrupted. "Nothing exploded when we brought them here. We'll send them back in a week, alright? Just one week to know our alternate selves." He grinned mischievously. "I know that big brain of yours is just _dying_ to seize this opportunity to learn about their universe."

Remus sighed. "Sometimes I wish you didn't know me so well. One week. _Not a moment more_."

"Nor," said James chirpily. "A moment less."

"So," Fake-Remus threw himself onto one of the armchairs. _Remus'_ armchair. "Answer something for me, Mr. Brains-a-lot."

The Siriuses, Peters, and Jameses all laughed, but Remus stiffened indignantly. Something told him that his alternate didn't share his smarts, or his quiet attitude. In fact, something about him seemed positively sinister.

But he grit his teeth and ground out, "What?"

"What happened to your _face?_ "

The Marauders stopped laughing and stared open mouthed in shock. Fake-Remus had been talking, of course, about the scars that were faintly visible from Remus' monthly transformations.

Remus' eyes narrowed, his nails biting into his palms. "That's none of your business." Apparently, this Remus wasn't a werewolf.

"Actually, I think it is, seeing as you're me." the other Remus grinned.

"I was attacked by a large animal." Remus told him stiffly.

Fake-Peter cleared his throat. "Obviously, there are differences in personality here. In _our_ group, I'm the... er-"

"He's the diversion." Fake-James offered. "And he's darn good at it, too, seeing as all the professors adore him."

The Marauders looked dumbfounded. Peter squirmed. "I'm usually the lookout." he mumbled.

Fake-Remus laughed. "That's _James'_ job."

Fake-James blushed in embarrassment, while James looked outraged. "You are _wasting_ my potential." he informed them.

"No," Fake-James said softly. "They're really not. I've tried to do other things, but, well... they tend to go badly."

In an obvious effort to save his friend from embarrassment, Fake-Sirius spoke up. "James helps me mastermind them. I help him keep watch."

"Well…" Sirius said. "At least you all are pranksters. James and I execute the plans. Peter keeps lookout. Moony masterminds, researches... What's so funny?"

The four imposters were all laughing. "Nothing," gasped Fake-Peter. "It's just- if Remus is planning them-"

"They must be terrible!" chuckled Fake-Remus. "I haven't got enough of a brain to do anything like a good prank!"

Remus turned red. "Obviously _you_ don't." he snarled. "But _I_ do."

"Alright, alright," Fake-Remus looked at him. "You're smart. Big deal. Now, boys, I'm beat. Where do we sleep?"

Remus wasn't sure how it happened, but 10 minutes later, he found himself curled up in one of the armchairs in the Common Room while his counterpart slept in his bed. The worst part? Sirius and James had told him that one night in an armchair wouldn't kill him. Peter, at least, had looked sympathetic.

As Remus tried to get comfortable, he couldn't help but think that he wouldn't get to sleep in his bed for a long time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sorry! Forgot to do the disclaimer: All characters you recognize belong to the genius that is J. K. Rowling.**

 **Chapter 2: Pushed Away**

"Remus? Remus? Are you alright?"

Remus opened his eyes to find a concerned Lily Evans standing over him. He realized that he wasn't in his bed, and wondered why.

Then it came back to him.

"I'm fine," he groaned, sitting up. He fished around in his brain for a believable excuse as to why he wasn't sleeping in his dorm. "I just fell asleep doing homework."

"No you didn't."

Remus raised an eyebrow. "How would you know? You went to sleep before me-"

"I _know_ because there aren't any books or parchment in sight." She glared at him. Then her gaze softened. "What really happened? They didn't kick you out of your own dorm, did they?" Her eyes hardened. "I wouldn't put it past them. Potter and Black can be right gits-"

"Lily!" Remus interrupted. "They didn't-"

"Then why aren't you in bed?" she demanded.

Remus couldn't find an answer.

Lily put her hands on her hips. "Right, that does it. You go get dressed- I'll go down to the Great Hall to talk to them."

That made Remus' breath hitch. "They went down to breakfast? Without me?" he asked without thinking.

He watched helplessly as Lily marched out of the common room angrily. Sighing, he trudged upstairs to the 6th year boys' dormitory. Fake-Peter, Fake-James, and Fake-Sirius were all there. Remus knew that they were the imposters because of his werewolf senses. They just smelled different from his friends.

"Sorry our Remus took your place," Fake-James said softly. "Your friends said you wouldn't care, but I think they must be pretty thick to believe that."

Remus' shoulders sank. So the non-werewolf had taken his place already. It didn't take long.

But he said, "They're not thick. Just excited. They'll come back in a while and see what they've done and apologize."

Fake-Sirius shook his head. "It's amazing how different you are from our Remus. I must say, I prefer you already. He doesn't have your Hufflepuff loyalty."

This did not ease Remus' worries.

* * *

James Potter was laughing merrily at something Remus had said. James honestly couldn't remember the last time Remus had looked so carefree. Or laughed so much. Or was so scarless.

James froze mid-laugh. Oh no…

"JAMES POTTER!"

He jumped. Lily Evans. Uh oh. However, this was a good distraction from the guilt he was feeling. He couldn't believe that he had mistaken this bloke for the real Remus…

Lily, face as red as her gorgeous hair, marched up to him.

"I knew you were a prat, Potter, but I didn't know that you would stoop as low as to kick your _own mate_ out of his _own bed-_ "

James winced. He had done that, hadn't he? His guilt grew…

"You better go apologize. You disgust m- Remus? How'd you get here before me?"

Fake-Remus gave her a lazy grin. "Marauder secret."

Sirius growled. "Get lost, Evans. Look at him, he's fine. He's been with us for half an hour. You sure you got enough sleep last night?"

Lily looked lost. "I- but- he-"

Peter smiled gently. "Must be the stress. Homework's been a killer, huh?"

"I- yeah, I guess you're right, Pettigrew…" she turned to James, now red from embarrassment rather than anger. "Sorry, Potter- I thought-"

"It's fine, Evans." he grinned. "You can make up for it by going out with me."

"Not if we were the last two people on Earth!" she shouted, and stormed off.

James sighed, disappointed, as he watched her go.

"Why do you bother?" Sirius asked, rolling his eyes. "Just forget about her and move on."

James looked at him, wide-eyed. "How can you even _suggest_ about _forgetting_ a creature as _beautiful_ , _exquisite_ , and _miraculous_ as _Lily Evans?_ "

Sirius sighed, shaking his head. Fake-Remus cocked his head. "You don't like her, Sirius?"

Sirius snorted. "Not particularly."

Fake-Remus grinned. "Your counterpart is dating hers."

" _WHAT?_ " James, Peter, and Sirius shouted together. They got many strange looks, and a warning one from Professor McGonagall.

"Please," James begged his best mate. " _Please_ don't tell me you like her."

Sirius looked him dead in the eye and said in a monotone, "I'm offended you would even consider that."

"Thank goodness!" James stood up. "We'd better bring the others something to eat." He looked at Peter and Sirius guiltily. "We left Moony alone."

Peter frowned. "That's what _I_ said earlier." he grumbled.

But Sirius simply said, "I know. He can deal with it. It's just a later breakfast."

James remained unconvinced. "We should have at least let him know beforehand."

Sirius' shoulders slumped. "Yeah. You're right on that."

They got up to leave, Fake-Remus reluctantly following them, and headed back to the common room.

To a fuming Remus Lupin.

 **Sorry it's so short- next chapter will be longer, I promise!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Confrontation**

James swallowed as he closed the door to the dormitory behind him. "Hey, Moony."

Remus, arms crossed, merely raised an eyebrow.

"Er," said Sirius awkwardly. "Your turn for breakfast."

Something flickered in Remus' eyes. His arms dropped to his sides, and he lowered his head slightly. "I noticed." he said quietly.

As he and the three imposters left to eat breakfast (none of them cared if it looked to their fellow students as though they had come back for more), James couldn't help but feel deeply ashamed that he had helped put that look of disappointment in his friend's eyes.

* * *

Remus led the way down to breakfast. The imposters (ha, thought Remus. The Imposters and the Marauders) seemed to look to him for direction- obviously because his counterpart was their unofficial leader where they came from. It was odd, leading. But not altogether unpleasant.

At the Gryffindor table, Fake-Sirius leaned towards him. "Why didn't you yell at your friends?"

Remus shrugged. "It was the one time. They're just… curious, is all."

Fake-Sirius snorted, but didn't press the matter, for which Remus was grateful.

Fake-Peter spoke up. "Who are we dating in this world?"

Remus looked up, surprised. His Peter had a crush on almost every girl at Hogwarts, but few had ever liked him back. He had been on a few dates, which was more than Remus could say, but Peter had never really bothered himself much with girls. Unlike Sirius and James.

"Er," he mumbled. "You, ah, aren't, Peter."

Fake-Peter looked disappointed, but nodded. "Prob'ly better that way. What about Sirius and James?"

Remus swallowed a bite of toast. "Sirius had dated almost every girl here at least once-"

Fake-Sirius nearly choked.

"-and James has been pining after Lily Evans for longer than I can remember. She has yet to say yes, though. To anything he asks."

Fake-James went pink. "I- _he-_ asks out her regularly? Am I supposed to?"

"Not if you stay in the dorm most of the time," Remus soothed. Fake-James looked relieved.

"But, back home, _I_ date Lily!" Fake-Sirius complained.

Remus really did choke this time. Fake-Peter pounded him on the back. "You- _what?_ " Remus gasped.

Fake-Sirius pouted while Fake-James patted his shoulder. "What about you, Remus?" asked Fake-James. "You dating Rita here, too?"

"Who?" Remus asked quizzically, taking a sip of pumpkin juice."

"Rita Skeeter."

Remus spat out his pumpkin juice. "Oh, Merlin, _no!_ " he shouted. "I- _ugh!_ "

The Imposters laughed. After Remus had composed himself, Fake-Sirius said, "So, are you Marauders going to all your classes? Or are we filling in for some of them?"

"I'm going to all my classes." Remus said firmly. "So is Peter- he can't afford to miss one. You'll have to ask James and Sirius what they want to do."

And they headed back to the common room to do just that. But, as they walked, Remus couldn't help but feel as though… he'd regret going back.

* * *

After the door closed behind Remus, Fake-Remus threw himself onto Moony's bed. " _Someone_ got up on the wrong side of the armchair this morning, eh?"

Peter looked uncharacteristically angry. "He has every right to be upset. We ditched him with his counterpart. How would that make _you_ feel?"

Sirius and James regarded Peter with surprise. Peter never spoke up against people. Apparently, that changed when his friends were threatened.

Fake-Remus snorted. "Kinda freaky, isn't he? All those scars, so uptight… everything in its place…" He pulled out one of the drawers on Moony's nightstand and dumped its contents on the ground.

No one made a move to pick it up. Peter's fists were balled, his jaw clenched, but he didn't say anything. Fake-Remus' smile grew.

"C'mon," he said. "Let's cause some _mischief_."

The Marauders glanced at each other with sly grins. Finally, something they knew how to do.

* * *

The next few days went by slowly for Remus. His counterpart was causing mayhem with his friends while Remus was in class- in three days, he had already served seven detentions for something he didn't do. When he and Lily patrolled the corridors during their prefect rounds, she asked him why he was getting into so much more trouble than usual. He told her that he got roped into the detentions because he was friends with James and Sirius, and that he hadn't done any of it, which was the truth. She believed him, thankfully.

On Friday, however, everything changed.

* * *

Sirius, James, and Fake-Remus stood in front of a furious Professor McGonagall. One of their pranks had gone horribly wrong. People had gotten hurt. James ad Sirius did feel ashamed, unlike usual, but Fake-Remus didn't seem to share their remorse.

"Never," whispered Professor McGonagall. "Have I witnessed such irresponsible behavior. No less than _ten_ students are in the Hospital Wing, thanks to you three. What have you got to say for yourselves?"

They stayed silent.

"And from my _own House_ , no less. I have never been more ashamed. The three of you have disgraced the house of Gryffindor. There are no words to describe my disappointment. No more Hogsmeade weekends until the end of the the term, detention every night for a month, and you are banned from the next Quidditch match _I don't care if you're the Captain, Potter_. Am I understood?"

They nodded sullenly.

Her nostrils flared. "Finally," she said curtly. "I'll need your Prefect badge, Mr. Lupin."

James and Sirius' heads snapped up, but Fake-Remus merely said, "It's on my other robes, Professor."

Eyes steely, Professor McGonagall crossed her arms. "Go get it. Bring it back in five minutes. _Get out of my sight_."

They scurried out of the room. One thought echoed through James' head.

 _Moony's gonna kill us._

* * *

Remus felt awful. The previous night had been a full moon, and he had had to endure it alone. As a result, every part of him ached, and he had been feeling nauseous all day.

The Imposters kept to themselves, so Remus had been very alone. At least they were going home tomorrow.

The door opened, and James, Sirius, and Fake-Remus walked through. Peter had been doing Transfiguration homework while they had been doing Merlin-knew-what.

Fake-Remus stalked up to him. "Need your prefect badge."

"No," Remus replied without looking up from his History of Magic essay. "I won't risk you losing it."

Sirius cleared his throat. "Congratulations, Remus!"

Remus looked up, frowning. Since when did Sirius call him Remus? What happened to Moony?

Sirius continued. "You don't have to do prefect duties anymore!"

Remus' blood turned to ice. "Why?" he whispered.

James shrugged. "Prank gone wrong. Right Padfoot? Moony?"

To Remus' horror, Sirius and Fake-Remus both nodded. "Prongs is right," said Fake-Remus. "Now. You need to get that to McGonagall. Hey Wormtail?"

Peter looked up. "Yeah, Moony?"

"Wanna run to the kitchens?"

"Sure."

"You coming Prongs, Padfoot?"

"Course, Moony!" exclaimed Sirius. "A Marauder's kitchen run is just what we need!"

"I'm game." agreed James.

"Right," said Fake-Remus. He turned to Remus. "We'll do that while you run that up to McGonagall's office, like the good boy you are. I'd hurry if I were you. You're already ten minutes late."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Blow to the Heart**

Remus walked slowly to Professor McGonagall's office. He knew he really _should_ be hurrying, but he was too shocked to do much more than trudge. He was gripping his prefect badge tightly in his sweaty fist, it's hard edges cutting into his palm. He felt numb. He wasn't fully processing what had just happened. He was losing his prefect badge? Sirius and James had known this, but hadn't told McGonagall the truth- that it hadn't really been Remus?

Maybe, looking back, he shouldn't have been surprised. They had been making him complete his counterpart's detentions, had let him take the blame for their pranks, had been ditching him, all week. It felt like he'd been replaced. Yet Remus had never said anything. Why? Because he didn't want to lose the only friends he'd ever had. It never occurred to him that if they weren't very good friends if they left him for sticking up for himself. He supposed that he shouldn't be surprised they had found a new Moony. Fake-Remus was, after all, so much more of a Marauder than he was.

But that didn't make it hurt any less.

He should have said something. Then, if they abandoned him, he'd still have Lily as a friend. But by now he had waited too long- Lily had given him dirty looks all week, since she thought he was behind all the dangerous pranks. Now he had no one.

Then there was the matter of his prefects badge. When he had first gotten it, he'd been terrified of how his friends would react. They had teased him when they found out, but hadn't mocked him as he'd feared. But he'd been secretly proud to be wearing it. Ever since he arrived at Hogwarts in his first year, he had worked _hard_ , to prove that he deserved to be there. Getting his badge proved that he wasn't just Dumbledore's charity case, but a valued student- that it didn't matter that he was a werewolf. Getting it taken away like this- it felt like a blow to the heart. Like someone was telling him that a werewolf could never be deserving of such an honor. Like he couldn't amount to anything simply because of his lycanthropy.

But worst of all, he felt like he was letting down the only wizard who had ever given him a chance.

He stood in front of McGonagall's office, dread pooling in the pit of his stomach. His hands trembling, he opened the door, forgetting to knock. He slipped inside, closing the door behind him.

"It's about _time_ , Mr. Lupin. You're nearly a half hour late." snapped Professor McGonagall.

This was it. This was when he'd confess everything- explain about the book, and the counterparts, and how it hadn't really been him.

Either he was a coward, or a fool.

He didn't confess. The instinct to protect his friends was too strong, even though they had done nothing to deserve it. As he handed his badge over, he realized that they were even now. He had more than paid them back for the Animagus thing by doing this.

It didn't console him in the slightest.

McGonagall sighed as she took the badge from him. "I must admit, Mr. Lupin," she murmured disappointedly. "I had high hopes for you. It appears I was mistaken."

The wind was knocked out of him. She couldn't have said anything to make him feel worse.

Fighting back tears, Remus excused himself from her office and raced to the library. In that moment, he hated his roommates. Hated them for treating him like something expendable.

Hated himself for believing they'd come around.

He was Moony no longer. The Marauders were finished, in his opinion. They could all rot.

Remus was going to throw himself into his schoolwork until he graduated. He would avoid the others. He'd look into joining a werewolf pack. He gave up any hope that he'd be able to find a wizarding job. He'd look for one in the Muggle world. Just the thought of that deeply wounded his already-low self-esteem.

Lily ignored him at dinner. She had heard what had happened and was disgusted that anyone could treat something she greatly treasured with such carelessness.

 _Oh, Lily_ , he thought as he glumly stared at his potatoes. _If only you knew_.

* * *

James waved sadly as their counterparts entered the freaky-blue-light-thing. "Maybe we'll see you around, Moony!" he called.

Fake-Remus turned and grinned. "Probably not. You've got a lot of broken pieces to put back together." His grinned turned… evil.

Beside James, Sirius frowned. "What do you mean?"

"You self-centered prats!" Fake-James suddenly yelled. Everyone stared at him in shock. This was so unlike Fake-James that everyone was stunned into silence. "I thought the three of you would be better people, he talked about you so highly! But I was wrong! You left him. Do you know how that feels? No. You don't. But you threw him away without any thought as to how he'd feel. I know his secret! I'm surprised he's lasted this long, with friends like _you_." He spat the last word out, and whirled around and disappeared into the light.

"What?" Sirius asked, dumbfounded. "Who're you talking about?"

Fake-Sirius sighed. "James may be quiet, but he's perceptive. He's my best mate. I always make sure he's alright, not left out, because it's easy for people to forget about him. He's like _your_ Remus, who, in case you've forgotten, still exists." He left.

Cackling madly, Fake-Remus began to disappear. "Don't blame me, boys! Just causing a little _mischief!"_

The light vanished, taking the Imposters with it.

Peter turned to his friends with wide eyes. "Merlin. We missed the full moon. We called that guy _Moony!_ We-" he gasped in horror. "We got Remus' prefect badge taken away!" Peter pulled at his hair. "We're the worst friends in _existence!_ We deserve to get _mauled_ next full moon!"

Sirius looked worried, but tried to act casual. "Wormtail, chill. He's probably just been hanging with his super-smart friends. And why would he care about the stupid badge?"

Peter glared at him. "None of his ' _super-smart friends'_ like him, because he hangs out with us! He doesn't fit in there! And he cares about his prefect badge because it makes him feel like he can get over his lycanthropy and amount to something! You two don't even _try_ to consider how hard everything is on him! I was the only one to ask him how his career advice went last year. You know what he said? He said McGonagall told him a job in the Muggle world was his best bet! That's an insult to his intelligence! He was upset for _weeks_ , and all you two could talk about was how you couldn't wait to be _Aurors!_ He constantly feels as though he has to prove himself worthy of being here, while _we_ just take it for granted! We made him feel like he didn't need to prove anything to us, and what do we do when his counterpart _without_ his lycanthropy comes? We replace him, like there's something wrong with him! Remus deserves better friends than us. We're terrible people." Shoulders slumped, Peter began to walk out of the common room. "I'm gonna find Moony and apologize! Hopefully, he'll listen."

Silence. Then-

"Bloody hell," Sirius breathed. "The rat's right." Sirius looked down at his shoes. "I really _am_ a Black, through and through."

James felt beyond ashamed. "I didn't know Moony felt that way. And to think, we've been treating his condition like some minor problem…"

James and Sirius felt their precious friendship crumbling away. They had broken the Marauder's Code. They had betrayed a member. And they hadn't even realized, until it was too late.

 **A/N:**

 **Hey! I really appreciate everyone who has read this story. You all make my day. :)**

 **I just wanted to say, thanks for taking the time to read. Also, I really like getting feedback- whether its constructive criticism, or praise. And, finally, reviews make updates happen more quickly, so...**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Collecting the Pieces**

Peter was desperate. He had searched every inch of that library, it seemed, but he was still unable to find Remus.

Peter couldn't believe that he had called the Fake-Remus Moony, as if that imposter was anywhere _near_ as amazing as the real Moony was. Remus was Peter closest friend. James and Sirius were always going off on their own, but Remus always made sure that Peter wasn't left behind. Even as Moony- the wolf always made sure Wormtail hadn't fallen off Prongs' antlers, or something. James and Sirius wouldn't even know Peter existed if Remus had made them give him a chance in first year. And what had Peter done to repay him?

Left him behind, replaced him- the very thing Peter was most afraid would happen to him.

Peter ducked behind a bookshelf and decided that he'd continue his search as Wormtail- Wormtail could always find people who didn't want to be found.

It worked. His rat ears could pick up someone's labored breathing. Peter transformed back, and quickly made his way over to Remus. Remus was in a very dark corner that was secluded by shelves- and by the amount of dust, Peter knew Remus was the only one who went back here. This must have been where Remus sometimes disappeared to when he wanted to be alone.

Remus was curled up in a seemingly uncomfortable position, a book resting in his lap. He was letting out these odd gasps and hugging himself. He wasn't crying, but he was close to it.

Peter gulped, hoping Remus' werewolf hearing would pick up on it. No such luck. "Er- hi." he squeaked.

Remus looked up sharply. He tried to glare at Peter, but Peter could see the hurt in his eyes, and felt a pang of guilt, seeing how he was the reason it was there. "What do _you_ want?"

Peter swallowed nervously. "To apologize." he whispered.

Remus's gaze hardened, but Peter barrelled on. "We- _I_ was a horrible friend to you. But you should know- and I can't speak for James or Sirius- but you should know that I didn't hang out with him because he was a better you- I hung out with him because he was _new_. I wasn't trying to replace you- I was only trying to be his friend- and in doing so, I forgot that you're the best friend I've ever had. I can't take back what I did- I can only apologize and hope you'll accept it- I know I don't deserve to be forgiven. I just need you to know that I'm sorry."

Remus' shoulders sagged. His eyes were shiny, and with a jolt, Peter realized that Remus was crying for real. Peter had never actually witnessed Remus shed a tear, not even when they had found out he was werewolf. But he had seen Remus come close. Now, however, Remus had reached his breaking point. And Peter had never been more ashamed to realize that he had helped push Remus across that line.

He watched helplessly as Remus' face crumpled, and he dropped his hand in his hands. His shoulders began shaking- that was the only indicator that his was sobbing. If Peter listened really hard, he could hear Remus' strangled gasps.

"It-it's just-" Remus began. Peter had to step closer to make out what he was saying. "You all told me that you'd never leave me- especially not for what I am. But as soon as a different me comes along- one w-without lycanthropy- you all flock towards him. I guess it made me r-realize that on some level, you all _do_ care. It still affects our friendship. Maybe you're not aware o-of it, but part of you _is_ disgusted by me, wishes that I were _normal_. And as soon as I was, you left this version of me. Let me assure you of this, though- nobody wishes I were normal more than I do. Sometimes, on really bad days, I even wonder if everyone would have been happier if Greyback _had_ killed me."

Peter gasped, horrified, and opened his mouth to protest, but Remus was on a roll. "And don't try to tell me it was because he was _new-_ Fake-James, Fake-Sirius, and Fake-Peter were all new too, but you guys barely even talked to them. It all boils down to my condition. And I've accepted that, I have- it-it just hurts. Because I, the _fool_ that I am, made myself truly believe that to you all, it didn't matter. I know better know." He was whispering now. "It will always matter. No matter what I do, when it comes down to it, all people can see is the monster. That's the real curse."

Remus gathered his things and left the library, leaving a shell-shocked Peter behind him.

* * *

"Er- Evans?" James asked tentatively. Lily turned. "Please don't yell at me!" James added hurriedly.

Lily sighed. "What do you want, Potter?" she snapped.

"I- I just wanted to know if you knew where Remus was."

Lily rolled her eyes. "How should I know? I haven't spoken to him since he got his badge revoked- and I thought he was different…" she added in an undertone.

James gulped and looked at Sirius, who was standing behind him. "That whole badge thing… _technically_ , he didn't deserve that."

Lily's eyes widened, then narrowed. "What, _exactly_ , does that mean, Potter?"

"Not important," Sirius interrupted. "Evans, we need to find him. He's gone missing. Any ideas?"

She still looked suspicious, but answered, nonetheless. "Check the library." She walked away.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Peter never came back from the library. Just proves my theory that it either corrupts you into a studious student, or eats you alive."

James didn't laugh. "We gotta find Moony, mate. Who knows what he'll do."

"What I don't get," Sirius mumbled as they walked down the corridor. "Is if it was bothering him so much, why didn't he say anything?"

James shrugged. "Who knows? Moony's weird like that. He doesn't exactly act like a normal bloke, does he?"

"Gee," a voice to their right said coldly. " _Thanks_."

James and Sirius spun around in horror, coming face-to-face with Remus. "We- I-" Sirius stuttered.

"Nice to know how you really feel." He shoved past them, leaving them with their mouths agape.

Peter ran up a few minutes later. "Have you seen- oh. You have. I need to tell you what he said."

Peter recounted his story, leaving James and Sirius feeling worse than ever. As Sirius filled Peter in on their encounter with Remus, James hugged himself. He wished Remus had told them that he felt that way about his condition. He wished Remus had spoken up when they started ditching him. He wished Remus wasn't so secretive. But, most of all, he wished he wasn't such an arrogant, self-centered, oblivious, _prat_.

He wished he were a better friend.

An hour later, as he passed her in the hallway, James said tonelessly, "You were right, Evans. All these years. I'm an arrogant toerag. And now I'll pay for it."

* * *

Sirius led the way up to the dorms that night. He felt awful for what he had done to Remus, but he found it easier to joke about it than reflect on it. But now, even he couldn't make light of the situation.

He grabbed the doorknob to open the door. The common room was crowded below them, and Sirius was _dying_ to slip into his bed. It had been a long day.

It didn't open.

He rattled it for a few seconds before angrily yelling at the door, silencing the common room in the process, "Oh, very funny, Remus. Let us in!"

"No!" came the haughty reply.

"What do you mean, _no?_ " Sirius retorted angrily. "It's our room, too!"

"That didn't stop you a week ago!"

"Oh, give me a- Remus, I'm _sorry_ , okay? We're rubbish people. Now let us in."

"No."

"Oh, COME O-"

"Can we at least have our nightclothes?" James asked warily.

"N- well, actually…"

Someone's pyjamas came through under the door. Peter's.

James and Sirius waited, but theirs never came.

"You have got to be kidding me." grumbled Sirius. Then, louder, "How come Peter gets his?"

"Peter apologized!"

"SO DID I, YOU-"

"SIRIUS!" James shouted. "Just let it be."

Red in the face, Sirius crossed his arms stubbornly. But he remained silent.

The common room was openly watching them now, and it made Sirius even angrier. But before he could do anything about that, James said to Remus, "Can we have our homework?"

Pieces of parchment were shoved under the door- the answers covered in ink.

Sirius fumed. "YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT, YOU LITTLE-" James clamped a hand over his mouth.

"Shut it," he warned. "We have Remus Lupin, former Marauder, all-around genius as an enemy now. Unless you want your precious hair pink forever, _or worse_ , I suggest you stop shouting at him."

Right then, though, Sirius didn't want to think rationally. He wanted to make Remus mad. Because Remus shouting at him was better than the cold shoulder. AT least then Remus would have to acknowledge him.

So he said the most hurtful thing he could think of. "You filthy, undeserving, _half-breed_." he hissed at the door.

James and Peter gaped at him. "Sirius!" James whispered, horrified. "How could you?"

Lowering his voice so only Peter and James could hear, Sirius explained. "If he's shouting at me, he can't ignore me. If I can make him mad enough to come out-"

"There's one flaw in your plan." Peter growled. "That wouldn't make Remus angry- it would make him hate himself to the point where he'd sink into a depression." Shaking his head, Peter turned away. "Hogwarts without Moony isn't Hogwarts at all."

On the other side of the door, Remus was shaking with self-loathing. He didn't deserve to be here. Maybe he'd drop out. Although, all he had ever wanted was an education… He rolled his eyes at himself. No kid his age wished for an education above all else. But their futures were secure. They could amount to anything, if they worked hard enough. But no matter how hard Remus worked, he'd never overcome his curse.

And now he had lost the only people who had ever allowed him to think differently.

He took a deep breath and stood up. Tomorrow was a new day. He'd decide whether he should leave tomorrow. He went into the bathroom and took a shower, then climbed into bed.

It all depended on tomorrow.


	6. Chapter 6

**Last chapter! Tell me what you think. Enjoy. ;)**

 **Chapter 6: Thoughts of a Wolf**

Remus woke up the next morning feeling… exhausted. Not physically- physically, he was ready to seize the day. He was more… emotionally exhausted. Too much had happened yesterday, and Remus was dreading facing classes.

He had worked hard on his Transfiguration essay, though, and it would be a huge waste of effort if he got a 0 on it for not turning it in.

He got ready quickly, and headed towards the Great Hall. It all went downhill from there.

First, Snape tripped him and Remus fell down the _moving staircase_ , hissing about foolish half-breeds. Then, Peeves swooped down the corridor, cackling his favorite phrase, "Loony, Loopy, Lupin!" and doused Remus with what Remus _hoped_ was purple ink. When he got to the Great Hall, he discovered that he hadn't been the only victim, but he still felt rotten. He had begun to walk over to sit with Peter, James, and Sirius, before remembering that, well, they were through, and then turned to Lily before remembering that she wasn't speaking to him either. So he sat by himself for the first time in a long time, feeling rather lonely. To make matters worse, all the meat on the table had been eaten already. Now, maybe it was a werewolf thing, but Remus _had_ to start the day with some sort of meat- otherwise, he had a terrible migraine the whole day. Feeling one coming on, he spread some jam on his toast, only to realize that it was blueberry jam, which he hated. He downed his tea, which was much too bitter, and headed out of the Hall, deciding not to eat anything. However, Snape chose then to make his reappearance with his friends Avery and Nott, and Remus found himself outnumbered. Then, suddenly, everything was upside down and spinning, and Remus felt like a fool as he hung upside down from his ankle, slowly spinning in a circle, a good half hour after the Slytherins had left. Which made him late for class, and gave him an automatic failing grade on his Transfiguration homework- the only reason he had left the dorm that morning.

Remus struggled to reach his wand, which had fallen to the floor when Snape had turned him upside down. He couldn't grab it.

"Remus?"

Remus tried to focus on the person who had spoken, but he was still spinning, so it was difficult. "Er- Amos Diggory?" he tried.

"Yeah… Do you need help?" Amos asked awkwardly.

"I've been stuck up here since breakfast." Remus replied sarcastically. "'Course I don't need help."

Amos winced. "That means you've missed half your classes. It's lunch."

Remus cursed.

Amos let him down. Remus thanked him, gathered his things, and staggered back towards the Hall, horribly dizzy.

After he had turned in all his late homework and eaten an apple, Remus went to the common room to read all the chapters the others had covered in the classes he missed, attempting to catch up. Or, he tried to. Apparently, the password had changed.

He sat outside the portrait hole, trying _so hard_ to concentrate on his work, but he was too hungry. The day's events kept replaying in his head, making him want to hurl his books off the Astronomy Tower. Then two Hufflepuffs third years walked by. Due to his werewolf hearing, he heard more than he wished he had of their conversation.

"Did you finish the essay on werewolves, June?"

"Yeah. They're terrifying, aren't they? The Ministry's right to be keeping such close tabs on the one's who've registered- I wouldn't want to go to school with one, would you, Amy?"

The first girl laughed. "'Course not! I'm just glad most of them are hiding underground in- what do they call them? Packs?"

"Yeah. It's where they belong- they're dangerous. I say, let them be a danger to each other and not us humans."

"I agree, June. They're wild animals."

At that point, Remus couldn't hear any more, but what he had heard was enough.

Those Hufflepuffs were right. He should be with his own kind.

The thing that hurt the most? He tutored both of them.

* * *

"Sirius, James, aren't you worried about Remus? He never showed up to any of his classes…"

"Who cares where he is?" Sirius asked sulkily. "He's probably happier without us."

James sat up straighter. "But we aren't." he said slowly. "And the three of us are very selfish men, right?"

"Er-" began Sirius.

"Not really-" started Peter.

"We want Moony back, boys." James declared loudly, cutting them off. "And the Marauders always get what we want. If Moony doesn't want to be our friend, we'll force him to be. 'Cause we're selfish. And that's gonna save the Marauders."

A grin grew slowly on Sirius' face. "Mr. Padfoot agrees with Mr. Prongs. Very selfish."

"Mr. Wormtail questions Mr. Prongs' wording, but believes his heart is in the right place." Peter smiled.

"Mr. Prongs suggests we find Mr. Moony!" whooped James, and cheering, they left, leaving a very confused common room behind them.

* * *

Remus finished writing his letter. Actually, he had written four. One to his parents, explaining that he loved them very much, but that he was convinced that his joining a pack and leaving them forever would make them happier and free them of a burden. The second was to Dumbledore, informing him of his decision to leave the school, though he gave no reasons why. The third was to a pack near London, to tell them that he would be joining them before long. The fourth and final letter was addressed to Messrs. Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs, explaining his sudden disappearance and his desire to be left alone.

He headed to the Owlry, and mailed the letters addressed to his parents and Dumbledore, and was about to mail the one to the werewolf pack when his friends burst through the door, panting, the Marauder's Map clutched tightly in James' fist.

"Moony-" wheezed Sirius. "We came to say that- what are you doing?"

Remus regarded them coldly. He handed Sirius the letter addressed to the three of them, and continued tying the pack's letter to an owl. This was proving difficult, however, because his fingers had grown clumsy from nervousness. There was no going back once this letter was sent. He'd be doomed as an outcast forever, and quite frankly, it scared him.

"You're _leaving?_ " James gasped, incredulous. "You can't leave!"

"And why ever not?" Remus asked warily.

"We need you!" Peter sounded panicked. "It's not Hogwarts without you!"

"That's not what you thought the past week." Remus pointed out.

"Remus, you can't go there!" Sirius protested. "You're throwing your life away!"

Remus wiped his sweaty palms on his robes. "I'm pretty sure it's my decision whether or not to throw my life away."

James ran over and stood in front of the window. "We won't let you."

"Get out of the way." Remus ordered.

Sirius came forward and grabbed Remus' arm. "So help me, Moony, I will drag you to your bed, tie you down, confiscate your wand, and lock the door to the dorm, if need be."

Remus raised an eyebrow angrily. "It's back to Moony now, is it?"

His three friends looked suddenly ashamed. Their eyes were lowered, but James did not step away from the window, and Sirius did not let go of his arm.

"Yeah." whispered James. "It is." he looked up at Remus. "Moony, we came to find you to force you to be our friend again."

Remus blinked. "What?"

James took a deep breath and continued. "We miss you. We miss your brilliantness-"

"Not a word." Remus cut in.

"-we miss you correcting our grammar, and we miss- we miss-"

"Your sarcastic sense of humor." Sirius smiled gently. "We even miss the scoldings you give us."

"And," piped up Peter. "We miss sneaking into Hogsmeade for a butterbeer with you. It's not the same without you. We tried. It was boring."

James and Sirius were nodding vigorously. They all looked so sincere that Remus couldn't help but give them a small smile. But then it fell. "I'm still leaving." he stated quietly.

Sirius frowned. "Even if you live in a pack, Remus, you're still gonna be a werewolf."

"But they won't look at me like I'm some sort of monster." Remus murmured. "They'll be just like me."

"Except, they won't be." James said firmly. "Moony, they won't be like you. They're not gonna lock themselves up to avoid hurting others. No one else will speak so kindly of non-werewolves- they'll hate them."

"Yeah, mate." sighed Sirius. "You're the most selfless person I know. Just... if you do go," his voice broke. "Don't turn all bitter like they are. Don't-" Sirius suddenly pulled Remus into a bone-crushing hug. "Damnit, Moony. Don't leave. I'd never forgive myself."

"What do you mean?" choked Remus.

"Moony, _honestly_. If you leave now, it'll be all our fault. We sent you over the edge. We'll know that a week from now. We'll know that ten years from now. And we'll never be able to ease that guilt. I'll," he faltered. "I'll never be able to tell you that when I called you a- a _half-breed_ , that I was just trying to get you to yell at me, because I was tired of you ignoring me, and instead I just drove you away because I was just too damn _proud_ to swallow my pride and apologize, and call myself a git."

"Well," James croaked. "I feel the same way. The first bit, at least."

Peter nodded in agreement. "Don't go, Moony." he begged. "Please."

Remus was silent. Sirius began to pull away, defeated, but Remus yanked him back, and buried his face into Sirius' shoulder. "I suppose someone has to make sure you all don't end up in Azkaban."

All four of them laughed, and James and Peter joined the- very manly- hug.

The Marauders were a foursome once more.

* * *

They still hadn't pulled away from each other when Professor McGonagall came rushing in. "Remus, please reconsi-" her gaze fell on the startled boys, who were quickly untangling themselves. "Ah." she smiled. "I see you already have."

Remus was confused for a moment before he remembered the letter he had sent Dumbledore. "Oh no!" he gasped. "Professor I'm not leaving anymore. I-" his eyes widened. "I have to tell my parents I changed my mind!"

As he ran out, James looked Professor McGonagall square in the eye. "Professor, there's something you should know. We should have told you awhile ago. It concerns Remus' prefect badge…"

* * *

A week later, and the Marauders were wreaking their regular havoc. Remus' badge had been given back to him (though the four boys were given two months' detention for their deception), and Lily had once again resumed talking to him. Remus still thought of his lycanthropy as a curse, but, as he watched James and Sirius throwing potions ingredients at each other during one of their detentions, he realized that they'd never leave him for what he was- they'd never even consider it. He was happy, with the best friends anyone could ask for. He was finally happy.

After all, every curse could be broken.


End file.
